Dreams

Before I had children I fantasized about what my life would be like as a mother.  In many ways, reality has far exceeded any dream.  Having babies and watching how they change and explore the world around them is simply the most amazing thing.  I swear, if I stare at them long enough I can actually see them growing!  Sometimes I wonder how I got to this point in my life so fast.  But mostly, I'm in awe that this life I've always wanted is happening- right now!

While I was away over the weekend I was thinking about life.  Admittedly, there are some parts that I'm afraid I might look back at and be disappointed. Before I children, I had these dreams for my life as a mother.  Most of them include being outdoors, a lot.  And barefoot in the country.  This part we do well!  But I wanted to be intentional with all that I do.  And I'm not.  I feel like sometimes I'm just dragged down by either tiredness, too many things to do, or just not enough money to accomplish what I want. 

I wanted to make homemade meals, not boxed mac and cheese.  I wanted to live with music as our soundtrack to life, not tv.  I wanted to spend spare time in my garden, not on this dang computer admiring how others are living.  I wanted to live simply and not fill my house with toys from box stores. 

But it's not too late to change, right?  I know that change doesn't happen over night.  And somethings I probably won't be able to change too much.  But if I keep letting this life pass me by I'm afraid I'll have regrets.  And so, here's to being more intentional with the girls, to not letting tiredness drag down what I want to do, and make the things I want in this life happen.

Here's to more of this kind of life.